Been ages

Wow wow wow... It has been ages since I last update this blog, I think it is probably moldy now.

The last time i post a blog, I was still an assistant, a lot have happened since then but I am just too lazy to update my blog.. Guess this is going to be another long winded essay to summarise all in one.

Well, to begin with, I was promoted to tax consultant with effect from January 2011, but due to the shocking number of resignations, I never got my portfolio until February. So I actually took a senior's pay for doing junior's work for a month. I remembered, I cautioned them before, if the culture do not change for the better, people will never be happy, they will only view working as a torture.. And I got a junior before getting my own portfolio, which is pretty much amusing because at first, I really do not know what to give her.. since I was quite lost myself.

I realised how different it has been... Being a junior and a senior, the amount of stress doubled and for a whole month of February, I have difficulty staying immune and blending into the role. My junior was not too good then, but it was wrong of me to hold high expectations upon everyone. If the manager has not advised me to give her a chance, tell me that not everyone is a quick learner.. Maybe I would not have given others a chance. I see it now, and I see a significant improvement in her, in time, I will train her to be a great performer, but unfortunately, not now, I am only half alive from the peak period.

I was given an intern too, she is good, but too bad, she have to take unpaid leave now when I need her the most, because she did not got through a test.. sigh¬¬¬ I would willingly use my assistant, but I do feel sorry for her, I meant to be the strict one but I guess I can't because when I see Susan overwork her, I think it is not right for me to add into her burden, I do not want to see myself to be the heartless senior, so each time before giving her a lot of work, I would ask whether Susan gave her a lot of work... Because I seriously do not want to demotivate a person, especially on her first job.. I have learnt, people are motivated by different things.. When I was new, I remembered, I fought to be the best, I purposely buy books to catch up on my own because I want to show to the director, I want to make her regret, for transferring me from corporate tax to IES without giving me a chance to prove myself, they rate me according to my physical looks, which is pretty much, like a child still.

And I think I successfully done it ;)

My bosses are prepared to put me back to corporate tax in May, but feeling sorry for them due to the high turnover rate and also at the same time, I thought of myself having to complete my CPA examinations, I chose to delay my own ambitions for a year, which for the first time, I felt regret because when the portfolio listing came out, I was given all the not so good managers, which can be a pain in my ass.. DUH... but still, there is no reversing it, I have to face the truth and work my way through.. and counting down to a year..

I see people around me change.. I felt so down sometimes, I wonder where is the naive and innocent me who can stay happy no matter where I am.. or how stress I am.. I mean, I still can laugh, still can smile, but I really want to bang my head and sleep sometimes, its like I am having difficulty balancing my life with work, studies, family, friends and entertainment. I swear, after peak period and May exam, I am going to partttttaaaayyyy... maybe a shopping spreee.... woo-hoo!!

Lets see.. my status showed that I am 41% done.. that means I still have another 59% to go.. hmmm.. target this week, out at least 30 individuals.. which make it 92 out of 152 clients which i have.. that makes it.. um.. 61% done?? and have another 60 individuals.. arghhhh.. when is this ever going to end??

Never mind.. just try my best thats it!! Gambateh!! everything will be alright!! =) everyday is gonna be a better day..