After a long long wait, finally got my results today. All these time, i had hope to aim high, since this is the last ever exam i face in university, i was hoping for first class so desperately, although i know if i really got it, it will be a wonderful miracle that ever happen in my life, it can be describe as a self actualisation, but getting what i own now is not too bad, well, although it is not like what i had hope, but second upper is not too bad..
Always thought that i will never go back to uni again, but i did today, and realised that i really miss the lake a lot, where i used to jog and distress.. I thought that i will be meeting jason today, my personal tutor, and he will babble a lot, but much to my surprise, jason is not around and i was told to collect my results from chew ging, the director of undergraduate studies, i had been so relaxed since last night, but when i reach that door, and there was someone else inside, i became so nervous, as it will be the main point that shows whether i belongs to first class or second upper.
When i enter, i was so amused that the first question he post to me was, our pictures in facebook, he said he was laughing away and cannot believe his eyes, then i answered him that since we are only young once, just take the opportunity to be perasan as when we grew older, i dont think there will be another chance, just like i always tell others, if you dont make yourself pretty now while you are young, do we still have another chance to turn back time? exclude plastic surgery please, because i never believe in fake beauty.
I was disappointed and had expected such consequence when he told me it was a second upper, but he did mention that he was quite disappointed with us, and added that i am actually at the margin, they tried negotiate for me with UK for a first class.. unfortunely, it was not allowed, because first class is 68% and i got 67.3%, that 0.7% that change the ending.. i was so upset as i know that i had work so hard, i am quite a lazy pig when it comes to sleeping, and i have cut so much for the sake of exams... 5 hours a day, well, at least i did not do too bad.. mom knows how upset i really am, of course, from my effort, the whole semester where i did not watch movie at all, and my entertainment is only jogging and occassionally, designing.. cut off the time i spent for basic everyday activities, the rest of the time had been used for studying.. well, at least i did not move backwards, thats the point.. but i cant help it, just for today, let me be upset and moan for my result.. i got sensitive a little when others told me not to be upset, i cant help but to shed some tears.. never mind, its all over and done with.. at least i know, i worked hard, so i shall not have any regrets at all..
never mind.. i just need to aim to the future now.. 12+ days from now, i will be in office and a new beginning have arrived.. so i ought to be positive again and face my future.. i can do it for sure!! but for these two days.. i need to recover.. and i guess it have to be retail therapy.. not really buy things but walk around or window shopping is enuf..
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