what can you gain from being bitchy?

I suddenly feel so pissed, i just do not understand, why the people in this department act in this manner, if there is one description word for it.. it has to be bitchy... seriously bitchy.. it has come to the extent sometimes i cannot take it anymore.. and i want to return to where i belong asap...

personally, i do not believe in complaining too much, like time and again i have written in my blog.. because i think there is no use.. complains wont make your life any better.. it will only increase your hatred... how can anyone live happily like that? i miss people in cptx because they take work as responsibility, something they know with all their hearts they must do to attain, and i think that my personality suits there better..

yv is leavin next friday, the same day i have be getting my result for my first cpa paper, i am quite sad on it, because she is like one of my greatest friend..she is someone i admire from the bottom of my heart because despite her young age.. her inner strength is wonderful.. i respect her for her ability and intelligence.. and she is a wonderful friend... she cares a lot and she knows me very well.. and she is always trying to bring beauty into this world.. try to avoid all politics where possible.. but i understand she is suffering, because she is not born a strong girl, she has various allergies..

and people who do not know her well? what did they say? the crtics is just too much.. i am so freakin annoyed.. people in this department.. to avoid further gossips.. i do not talk further.. they call her the chinese girl who looks like malay.. just because she is born dark skinned.. we cannot control that can we? i praise her a bit, she is indeed a genius... thats why i respect her, nowadays.. no tca can become a senior after 6 months as an assistant, only her because she is capable.. their reply to me was cptx dun have but ies got.. right, maybe such things happen 10 years ago.. for anyone who step into this department can see that everyone is no longer young here.. minus new assistants like us..

what can you gain from being so bitchy and spiteful? nothing.. seriously nothing.. it will make you lose friends in the long run.. might as well practice kindness, wont we all be happier with life that way? i am very tired sometimes from their complains.. if you do not hold an optimistic point of view on life.. how can you ever be happy? all these while, for the past one year i hold on tightly to my own perspective about life.. i try to make myself happy and not to be influenced by them.. and i think i survived.. but i am indeed a bit strained sometimes, i tend to be a bit pessimistic..thats very bad.. i will try to turn around..

had lunch together with wica just now.. she mentioned about CPA exam results, i simply blurt that i dunno what my results are.. she said i will sure pass.. because she said so far, she overcome everything successfully despite taking everything last minute.. and she wants me to update her once i have gotten my result.. hmmm... could it be that i am supposed to be shadowed by her? dunno, but i sure hope so... i cant help but to notice the difference between people in personal and corporate tax.. how i wish i am back with corporate tax already..

yeah~ i hope i am able to do well.. and i hope that i can return to where i belong asap.. i rather face stress in work than to be in an environment that stressed me out, because i cannot control it at all..